Everyone’s professional network needs more weak links

The minute you step into the startup world, the importance of networking is drummed in. We’re told that success lies in chasing the right new connections, showing up at the right events, and hitting ‘follow’ on the right LinkedIn profiles. With opportunity seemingly only one new connection request or business card away, it can feel like you’re falling behind if you’re not constantly widening your contact book. 

Networks are critical. Research on VC firms published by the Harvard Business Review found that more than 30% of deals come from leads from VC’s former colleagues or work acquaintances, 20% are the result of referrals by other investors, and 8% are referred by existing portfolio companies. With almost two-thirds of deals arising from referrals, it’s no wonder investors and founders alike are desperate to broaden their circles.

However, as their eyes scan for new connections, too many professionals overlook the value their networks already hold. Many consistently ignore a significant portion of their contacts: the ‘weak links’. These are the connections deemed too fleeting or too peripheral to offer real value. But they neglect these at their peril. Although they may be tenuous, these relationships often turn out to be the ones that propel us furthest.

The current problem with networking

For many professionals, networking continues to be a constant struggle. While they keenly feel the need to increase and deepen their raft of connections, too few are able to overcome self-imposed limits. They believe they need to achieve a certain ‘appropriate’ level of interaction with someone before they make an approach (have I met them *enough* times?) or that they must wait for social permission (should I wait for them to add me first?). And so fruitful avenues remain unexplored. Confused as to where to start, or, if they’re really honest, thinking they don’t have enough to offer, they stick to the more comfortable routes: mentors, ‘warm’ introductions, established relationships. People who are ‘supposed’ to be helpful.

These routes are powerful, but an overreliance on them is limiting. Not only are relationships of this depth few and far between (and often time-consuming to cultivate), they yield inequitable results. 

The British Business Bank’s report on UK VC and Female Founders discovered that not all ‘warm’ introductions are equal: not only are all-female founder teams less likely to have a warm introduction to a VC than all-male teams, they appear to receive less benefit. A warm introduction means a startup is much more likely to progress from pitch deck stage to being funded at Investment Committee, but the benefit of a warm introduction is greater for all-male founder teams (2.1x benefit), than it is for all-female (1.8x) or mixed gender (1.5x) teams. Allowing an unequal vector to decide your fate isn’t the best approach.

The benefits of ‘weak’ links

Enter, the weak link. Everybody has these. The people you already know, or have met in passing, but shy away from approaching because the connection feels too flimsy: someone you met briefly who might not remember your name; an ex-colleague you haven’t spoken to in a decade; a workshop leader from a course you took years ago. 

These ‘weak’ connections in fact contain great value as they often turn out to be the best gateways to new information, ideas and opportunities. Their presence on the periphery of your network is what’s central to their strength. They pull us out of professional echo chambers and linear career paths towards spaces and possibilities we may not have discovered on our own. Their apparent distance from our lives is their very value.

And I speak from experience. I could list reams of examples where weak links have led to investments, but one that sticks with me is where the opposite happened. As an LP investor, referencing GPs is a hugely important step before making an investment. We were doing due diligence on a fund once and noticed an unusually high level of churn amongst female team members. The GPs offered their perspective, of course, but I did some more digging. Through the different layers of my network, I was able to get in contact with the women who’d left and heard a very different explanation. Needless to say, we didn’t end up investing in the fund. It was the right decision – and one built on information that wouldn’t have seen the light of day without the trust and reach I’d garnered. 

More recently, I came across the job description for the role I’m in now – CEO of Newton Venture Program – when someone forwarded it into a VC WhatsApp group. I’d met this person before but several years had passed since we were properly in touch, and they probably didn’t expect much when they shared it. But this weak link changed the course of my career. 

Strengthen your approach to meeting weak links

Even weak links must begin somewhere. If you want people to feel warmly enough about you that they’d be willing to help you further down the line, the way you interact with them initially matters.

Often I think we talk about making connections so much that we forget what it actually means to ‘connect’. Over fourteen years in the industry, the most important thing I’ve learnt about networking is to avoid being transactional and instead focus on what I have in common with someone and where our values align. That might not always mean you meet the most obviously “helpful” person in the room, or the one that everyone wants to talk to, but it makes for the most meaningful conversations. It’s what’s helped me build a trusted network of people that I know operate with kindness and integrity. And in turn, they introduce me to people with those same traits. 

So, what does that approach look like in practice? Like many other areas, it’s a skill that needs honing, but there are a few fundamental things you should (and shouldn’t) do.

Firstly, leave the hard sale techniques on the stage. When you meet someone new you may feel the pressure to reel off your CV, or rapid-fire through your deck, but an introductory handshake isn’t the green light for an instant pitch. Launching into a hard sell is one of the quickest ways to turn off a new acquaintance, and it makes it far less likely they’ll respond warmly when you reach out later down the line.

While talking about what you do and sharing your passions is obviously important, networking is a marathon, not a sprint. Forcefully championing your business isn’t going to magically create an opportunity from the person in front of you and only makes them less likely to want to hear from you in the future. Instead, taking that pressure off yourself, and focusing on learning more about them and any common interests, plants a seed of connection that helps weak connections to flourish.

And listen! We all know the frustrating feeling of talking to someone whose eyes are constantly darting over your shoulder to spot a more ‘important’ person in the room to talk to – it’s the quickest turn-off. The opposite is active listening and it’s one of the best ways to foster meaningful connections. Not only does active listening help with the practical side of networking (allowing you to ask relevant follow-up questions and keep the conversation flowing), it makes the other person feel valued. Even if they don’t remember your name or job title years later, they’ll remember how you made them feel.

Finally, prioritising authentic connection over a transactional exchange doesn’t mean you can’t be prepared. Before any networking event, it’s helpful to be clear on what your professional goals are, identify any network gaps, and know how you’re going to talk about your current role or business if it comes up. Networking is daunting for everybody, but turning up with a sense of internal clarity on why you’re there can help you to feel a lot more confident when you enter the room. And remember – you don’t need someone else’s permission to be there.. You’re there for a reason, just like the rest of them. That knowledge makes it far easier to approach someone naturally, and without overthinking whether you know them well enough or have enough to offer. 

Turn chance encounters into pivotal moments

So you’ve met someone interesting. What next?

Just last year I was at a Black Women in Leadership dinner and happened to be seated next to a VC and a former founder. Within minutes we realised all three of us were on a ‘career gap year’. It was a serendipitous seating arrangement that could have provided a few hours of entertainment and ended there. After all, none of us knew for sure that we could help one another professionally. But the common ground we shared was the phase of life we were in. So we set up a small group we jokingly called “Funemployed” to support each other through that time, sharing opportunities, events and encouragement whenever one of us needed it. And we still catch up now. 

All that is to say: don’t overthink it. People are people. If you meet someone and have something to talk about, send those small, human follow‑ups: a quick note to say it was nice to meet; an article you think they’d enjoy; a comment on something they’ve posted; or an invitation to an event you’re going to anyway. These tiny touchpoints keep you present in someone’s mind without pressure or expectation. The worst that can happen is silence. And even then, you’ve lost nothing. But more often than not, people appreciate the thought, and a weak connection becomes a warm one.

The same goes for someone you crossed paths with years ago. Popping up again to say hello doesn’t do any harm. There’s often an out‑of‑sight, out‑of‑mind approach to networking, but think of all the people you’ve met and the experiences they will have had since you last spoke. This could be a goldmine for new opportunities. So if you see someone’s started a new job or moved back to your area, say hi. If you’re filling a panel slot and the perfect person is someone you haven’t spoken to in five years, ask anyway. Even if they take a moment to remember you, the connection is still there, and it’s often stronger than you think.

There’s also a lot to be said for making use of the connections you crossed paths with indirectly. Maybe you attended the same course, worked in the same building, or are part of the same professional community. Maybe you’ve never even met. We see this every day at Newton Venture Program. Alumni who might never have overlapped still have a readymade foundation for making connections on LinkedIn or at events across the globe. Being part of a collective like this gives people an immediate reason to say hello, and these chance encounters often turn into fully fledged professional contacts, with many sharing dealflow or making investments together, simply because they bond over a shared experience. So think about where similar collectives already exist in your own network, and make the most of them.

The startup world revolves around networks, but too many professionals are ignoring a significant portion of theirs. In the pursuit of ‘concrete’ new connections, they overlook the value of the looser ones right under their nose. ‘Weak’ links are what make our professional networks strong and offer us the unexpected – but only if we’re bold enough to tap them.